../ R a m b l i n s ' / ..
Lately.. i've felt really depressed. I got into a fight with my best friend in real life and now we don't speak much.

I feel really lonely alot. Sometimes I get these feelings like.. I wanna' commit suicide or something or hurt myself on purpose. Like.. around the week before last, a few people and I gathered around eachother at our desks during first period of classtime.

Miranda had a key with her. She used to be gothic and hurt herself badly. With the key, she cut her arm and said it felt good. So, I grabbed the key and cut myself with it a bit, and so did the people sitting around me.

I don't really have any friends in real life, so whenever I see happiness, I treasure the moment.

Sometimes, I wish things were better. Sometimes I wish I didn't exist..

My great grandma' says she thinks I may feel insecure because I don't have a dad. (My parents are divorced). I think about my dad sometimes, even though I never knew what he was like.

The reason why my parents aren't together is because.. my mom was a green card. That means my dad only married her to get into the United States.

Another reason why they're divorced is because my dad was crazy. LITERALLY. He had bad mental problems. Sometimes I feel i've inherited them.

So, yeah, at the moment, I just wanna' hide...